The Evolution of Desire : Strategies of Human Mating by David Buss

How our ancestors shape our tinder preference ?

Those who fail to mate do not become our ancestors.

Pain, betrayal and loss contrast sharply with the usual romantic notion of love.

Sexual selection , it take in 2 forms

  1. Same sex competition
  2. Preference for particular qualities

Sexual strategies are solution to mating problems. We descend from a long line of ancestor who competed successfully for desirable mate, attract mate who have reproducibility value, retain long enough to reproduce. They fend off interested rivals and solve problem to impeded reproductive success.

Most human sexual strategies are most successfully carried out without the awareness of the action. For a wave-bird, if the nest is rejected by several female, it will often break it down and build it from scratch.

Men cannot fulfill their short term wishes without simultaneously inferring with women’s long term goal. We are carrying equipment that decided for ancient world.

Evert strand of DNA unfold within particular environment and cultural context. Selection over time focused women’s preference laser like on the characteristics.

The same man may differ in value for different woman, The value of potential mates, in short, depends on the individualized, personalized and contextualize perspective of the woman.

Women evolve preference for man with resources, personality characteristic. Women desire man who command a high position in society and social status is a universal cue of resources.

Hunting ability peaks when a man in his thirties. Ambition, industriousness, dependable, emotional stability are 2/3 of most high value characteristics.

5 action of intelligence :

  1. Wide perspective and see issue from multiple points
  2.  Communicate well to other people, good social skills
  3. Where to go to solve problem, imply good judgement.
  4. Manage money well
  5. Make few mistakes in take they never attempt before

A man’s size, strength, physical power are cue to provider of protection. Health, good health may be signaled by behavior as well as physical appearance. Symmetrical features, masculinity are also considered, masculine features include honest signal of good health. Sincerity, kindness are some of the most listed characteristic by women.

Mate copying : Female use apparent preference of other females as critical information of mating value.

Men have an evolved preference for whatever features are linked with status, which vary from culture to culture. Waist to hip ration is a powerful cue to women attractiveness. Standard of attractiveness are not arbitrary. Women were twice more likely to achieve organism with affair partners.

Less time a man should a man permit before obtaining sexual inter-course because larger number of women a man can bed. In sexual world, time is sexual opportunity.

Negative shift in attraction follower organism may reduce risk to man the man such as getting involved in unwanted commitment.

One key benefit of casual sex to women is immediate access to resources. Women especially value 4 characteristic in temporary lovers more than in committed mates. Women dislike economical , signal of stinginess in a lover. An affair allow a woman to evaluate his personality, how he hold up under stress and how reliable he is.

A lover may also serve as potential replacement for a woman’s regular partner. Women sometimes have affairs when they try to replace their current mate or easier to break off, or evaluated status by mating with a prestigious man.

The economics of mating, its easier for a woman to get a man from a higher status and better gene to have sex with her than to marry her. Woman prefer to have casual sex with men who are attractive to other women. Women are more exacting with physical attractiveness in a casual encounter than in permanent mate. Ovulating woman show stronger preference on masculine man, especially masculine body, voices and symmetrical.

Temporary mating means to access the value on mating market, experimenting, honing attractive skill and clarify their own preference.

Abundance / storage of eligible man can be determined by the future desirability as mate and many man pursue short term relationship, woman are forced to casual as fewer man are willing to commit.

Women state most effective tactics for attracting them would be display good manner, offer help, acting sympathetic and care.

Since ” any animal that can perceive can be deceived.”Displaying honesty is a powerful tactic a man can use to obtain a long term mate. Acting truthful, communicate feeling to her directly and openly , and being oneself. Display of physical power , its effective for attracting casual sex partner than for spouses. Display of masculine self confidence prove effective in attracting casual than committed mates.  Self confidence signal status and resources.

Men high in self esteem tend to approach physically attractive women and ask for dates. Appearing in difference and hard to get are more effective for woman than man. A woman might turn down all man expect the specific man he want, this signal he is getting an excellent bargain on mating market.

The most overt the sexual advance the man, the less attractive woman find.

Fitness signal theory : For fitness signal to be reliable and honest, they must be costly to produce.

Mate poaching has been successfully enough to have evolved as a distinct sexual strategy.  There are 2 tactics :

  1. Temporary invasion : Change one’s schedule to be around more than target than her current partner
  2. driving a wedge – actively promoting a break up, by boosting her self esteem

Those who pursue a mate poaching strategy have a larger number of life time sex partner and dating partners.

Men’s jealousy is especially attuned to rival who have status and resources. Woman’s jealousy attuned to rival who are physically attractive.

Mate retention strategy : Man to woman , can be love and kindness , then resources.

Emotional tactics to be used if they have less in mate value :

  1. Crying
  2. guilt
  3. submission
  4. intentionally provoke jealousy

Man who view themselves a specially high in mate values are more prone to experience the sexual bias.

Until next time !

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